Stop Being The Nice Guy/People Pleaser
A Complete Blueprint on Stop Being a People Pleaser Who's Always Being Taken Advantage of Without Any Ounce of Reciprocity/Gratitude & Become Leader that Commands Respect
The “nice guys” aka “people pleasers” are just a couple inner shifts away from commanding respect, loving themselves & living their life their own terms (not trying to meet other’s expectations)
At least, IF they allows their delusions to die (aka the hard part).
Here’s the exact blueprint on how to fix yourself…
What is a Nice Guy/People Pleaser?
Nice guys/People pleasers are basically people who put others satisfactions before theirs
They secretly f*****ing hates it , and yet keeps it all bottled up inside themselves & continues on without making any drastic behavioral / perspective changes (often due to the answer hiding where they’re most afraid to go).
Women & Men walk all over them, nobody listens to them, barely anyone takes them seriously, let alone respects them.
In fact; their whole life is basically a long continuation of “nobody ever reciprocating back to them what they give (time, money, energy, etc..) and them, silently resenting themselves for putting up with it for so long while simultaneously continuing to allow it.
Where does it all come from: The Origin.
Nice guys/People pleasers has a MASSIVE self-esteem problem.
They just don’t believe they’re worthy enough as they are. Like they just don’t belong.
And this manifests in their inability to listen to their intuition & just be themselves, and express their true desires, thoughts, or feelings openly
Simply put;
Their actions are driven by the quest for validation & fear of rejection, conflict, or judgment rather than authenticity, or personal values. (due to them being deeply ashamed of who they feel they are on the inside).
Now; Many researches / psychologists agree that this tendency often stems from childhood experiences.
For example; People who grew up in unpredictable environments (demanding parents, etc..) where they have to please parents to avoid punishment or neglect & where any effort to assert themselves is crushed on the spot
It’s easy to quickly develop a belief that your worth depends on keeping others happy & a fear of the potential consequences/disappointments your actions/decisions may lead to in your everyday life
It’s like you been programmed to feel “inadequate” unless they manage to meet others expectations..
A survival strategy…
This may have appeared as “conditional love” where child only received love, approval, or attention when they behaved “good”
Or even as emotionally unavailable or critical parents who left the child no choice but to learn to adapt & please in order to feel safe, accepted, or valued.
Anyway, all same result..
Becoming an adult who believes their worth depends on others’ approval.
Of course; Sometimes it may have nothing to do with your parents:
Maybe it is you had no, or little friends at school
Maybe it is you were kicked out of the tribe/group
Maybe it is you were picked last everytime had to form a group
Anyway you get the idea..
Could be any situation that may have hurted your self-esteem as you were growing up
Now; you could find thousands of explanations of why exactly you’re a people pleaser, but end of the day it all comes to the same issue..
A self-esteem problem.
Because like I said earlier nice guys/people pleasers believe there is something inherently wrong with them..
Thus; see people pleasing as the only way for them to hide to hide their flaws, be loved, get their needs met, and have a smooth life.”